Long before spooning was a romantic gesture, it was a way to sleep with someone you trusted. In prehistoric times, cavemen used to sleep together naked in the spooning position as a way to keep each other warm in the winter, and to offer protection against potential predators.
While we don’t have such worries nowadays, spooning remains a way to feel closer to your partner and maintain intimacy in a relationship.
There are so many benefits to spooning for both mind and body, so what’s it all about?
What does spooning mean?
Spooning is a type of cuddle where two people lie facing the same direction. One person faces away while the other person lies behind, stomach to back.
The phrase ‘spooning’ was coined for this position, as you’ll look like two spoons stacked sideways together in the cutlery drawer. The one being hugged from behind is called the “little spoon”. The other is the “big spoon”. Traditionally, the taller person will be the big spoon and the smaller person will be the little spoon, but not always.
When this is reversed, people affectionately call it “jetpacking” or “jetpack cuddling”. This is because the smaller person looks a bit like a human jetpack on the other’s back.
Many people taking the big spoon position wrap their arms around their partner, but the arms and legs can go anywhere that feels comfortable. Some people also like to intertwine their legs with their partner’s, while others just keep them next to each other.
What are the benefits of spooning?
There are several huge physical and psychological benefits of spooning, according to research published in the Journal of Psychosomatic Medicine. Most importantly, spooning – and hugging more generally – leads to a release of oxytocin.
The study examined 38 couples who lived together, aged between 20 and 49 years old. All involved went through 10 minutes to resting alone. Then 10 minutes of “warm contact” – i.e. hugging – with their partner. After this, there was a further 10 minutes of post-contact rest by themselves. The researchers discovered a strong link between partner support and higher oxytocin levels. This was the same for both men and women in the study.
Also known as the “feel good” hormone, the rush of this hormone makes us feel very happy, comforted, supported and loved. But as well as having psychological benefits, it also has secondary impacts on the body that produce serious health benefits.
1. May lower blood pressure
Research published in the Journal of Biological Psychology found that a higher level of oxytocin was linked to lower blood pressure and heart rate, especially in premenopausal women.
The study examined 59 women before and after “warm contact with their husbands/partners ending with hugs”. They discovered that those who had more frequent hugs with their partner had higher oxytocin levels.
In addition to this, they found lower blood pressure and lower resting heart rate than others.
2. May lower cortisol levels
If you’re looking to learn how to lower your cortisol levels (the stress hormone), look no further than your bedmate. The release of oxytocin has been proven to reduce stress, alleviate pain, and boost the immune system.
According to a study published in the Journal of Psychosomatic Medicine and Psychotherapy, this is because oxytocin reduces cortisol levels in the human body.
For the same reason, spooning can also be a natural anxiety remedy. The combination of oxytocin-induced low cortisol levels and low blood pressure puts the body in an anxiolytic-like state. This “stimulates different variants of social interaction”, easing anxiety in those who are chronically prone to the condition.
This, in turn, helps those who struggle with anxiety-based insomnia get into a stage of sleep known as deep sleep, which is essential for all the body’s processes.
3. May promote wound healing
Yes, really. There are studies that suggest oxytocin promotes growth and wound healing. So, if you get a papercut, it’s time for a cuddle.
Oxytocin plays a major role in the process of angiogenesis (creating new blood vessels). Research from Università degli Studi di Milano shows that injuries take more time to repair themselves when people are under stress or experiencing emotional turmoil. Both of these situations have links with lower oxytocin levels.
Another study looking at couples found that the physical wounds of those who had intense conflict behaviour in their relationship healed 40% slower than the wounds of those who were in relationships without conflict.
4. Creates intimacy without sex
Away from the impact of oxytocin on the body, spooning creates “intimacy without sex”, says Emma Davey, a relationship counsellor at MyTraumaTherapy.
“It makes you feel loved, wanted and cared for, which everyone in a relationship wants to feel. Feeling all these things makes you want to be closer and more trusting of your partner,” she says. In turn, this can help spice up your relationship.
For those who may struggle to articulate their feelings or show affection in other ways, spooning can be the answer, she adds.
“It’s a very private act where your partner can show you affection in a way that’s natural to them. For example, they may struggle to articulate their feelings for you or hold your hand in public. But in private, when it’s just the two of you, they can show they care strongly and deeply about you. They’re trying to keep you safe and comfort you in the night.”
5. Can help boost your sex life
Spooning can also improve the sexual side of your relationship. There’s the spooning sex position, of course, but even spooning without a sexual element can help you have better sex and improve satisfaction in the bedroom.
A review linked to the University of Connecticut looked into this. Researchers examined several papers and found that adults (regardless of gender) in relationships characterised by frequent affectionate behaviours were “more sexually and rationally satisfied than adults” in relationships where there was little affectionate behaviour.
“Remember, a hug can be a thousand words. If you’re feeling low within yourself, just having your partner there and holding you can be enough to make you feel safe, loved and supported,” says Davey.
(Image credit: Getty Images)
How long should you spoon for?
Most of the studies we’ve looked at have concluded that around 10 minutes of spooning is enough to produce good oxytocin levels.
However, as family therapist Virginia Satir once famously told Forbes magazine, “We need four hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth. While that may sound like a lot of hugs, it seems that many hugs are better than not enough.”
Cuddling vs spooning
Cuddling is the general name for close, affectionate bodily contact. Spooning is a type of cuddling.
They both involve body-to-body contact, but spooning is almost always done in a bed where you have more space and are lying down.
