“When people see Svitlana and me working and laughing together on my cake stand, they’d have no clue what our relationship is,” says cake maker Kara Dexter, 53, from Cheshire.
Although they appear to be both long-term friends and colleagues, nobody would guess that the relationship is something much deeper. Indeed, the sweetest thing on a Cakes by Kara stand isn’t for sale – it’s the connection between the two women from different worlds who came together as family.
“I watched in disbelief in February 2022 as the news about Russia’s invasion of Ukraine rolled in, and I wanted to do something. My husband Mark and I discussed fostering or supporting refugees. We had the space. We had the willingness. So, when we heard about the Homes for Ukraine scheme, it felt like the right time to act.”
Katie, Mark, Harry and Kara
(Image credit: Kara Dexter)
“Yet we also had to consider how our children Katie and Harry, aged 16 and 14 at the time, would feel having a stranger living in their home – especially as Harry was very shy and Katie was in her final year of school. Thankfully, though, they were wonderfully supportive of the idea.
“I saw a message on a local Facebook group from someone in need of bedding and phones for a Ukrainian they were hosting. I got in touch with this family to ask if the lady staying with them, Oksana, had any family members who needed help.
“That’s how we became introduced to Svitlana and her daughter, Kate – Oksana’s 40-year-old sister and 18-year-old niece who lived in the small city of Vinnytsia in central Ukraine.”
Moving in
(Image credit: Svitlana Svichar)
“We had some video calls together, for everyone’s peace of mind, and by May 27th, they were on their way to start a new life with us. It must have been so daunting for them, especially as I had to be away when they arrived. Mark picked them up from the airport and got them settled, so they were putting their trust in a man they barely knew.
“Two days later, despite the language barrier, we instantly felt like friends when we met. Very quickly, it felt like we were family. We all knew very early on that one day we’d all be together at any potential future weddings of our children.
“We made it clear that our home was also Svitlana’s and Kate’s home. They had an en-suite room to share and complete freedom to join us anywhere in the house, or not at all.
“At first, they kept to themselves a lot, watching Ukrainian TV upstairs and wanting to stay connected to home. Over time, things shifted. Svitlana started joining me for tea, staying for chats, and asking questions about the English language. It never felt awkward.
“The only change I made to my life is that now I never wear my pyjamas downstairs!”
Settling in
Svitlana and Kara on the cake stall
(Image credit: Kara Dexter)
“Just three weeks after her arrival, Svitlana started a job in a local office, having been warmly welcomed by the community in our village, Holmes Chapel in Cheshire.”
Meanwhile, Kate had been able to transfer her studies from the Ivan Frankl National University of Lviv to online until she moved to Lithuania a few months later for university. “She’s now studying for a Master’s degree there and comes home to us during the holidays,” says Kara.
Despite working full-time, Svitlana also chooses to help Kara with her Cakes by Kara business. “I never asked Svitlana to help – she just showed up, saw what needed doing, and jumped in,” says Kara, adding, “She’s the boss on the market stall!” Her English, once hesitant and reliant on Kate, is now peppered with local colloquialisms and good humour.
Part of the family
“We’ve shared many happy memories together, including a Christmas with 12 traditional Ukrainian dishes. I see the experience as a gift. We’ve all learned and grown.
“I’ve gained family and seen courage and resilience up close. Harry has grown in confidence, and as Katie heads off to Australia, she carries with her the lived understanding that you can make a life in a new country and that distance doesn’t have to break connection.”
For Svitlana, the experience is bittersweet, but she is happy. “This event was not planned in my life, especially in such a context, but circumstances forced me to make a decision for myself and my daughter,” she says.
“I was worried, but Kara and her family welcomed us so warmly and provided a sense of peace, comfort and acceptance. I am deeply grateful that they became our safe haven and family in the UK.”
